Friday, October 26, 2007
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Death by study
I have picked the date for my boards and am aiming towards taking them mid november. I am now rethinking the date and trying to figure a better one a month later.
Throughout this process I think I might be going crazy.
Since I study so much, navy has told me I have "nuke syndrome." Apparently all the "nukes" (nuclear engineer's) on the ship are uber smart. In fact they're so smart they don't get normal concepts. In navy talk he basically just called me a ditz. I can spit out the fact that the mentally challenged girl I saw at a national park has angelmann's syndrome, but ask me what time it is and I stare at the clock for a good 1-2 minutes before I can figure it out.
I have also been dealing with self esteem issues. My test grades aren't up to par, and I'm being self critical. This must also mean in my fragile little mind that navy doesn't love me anymore and that he's now attracted to the hot blonde on his softball team.
Yes, I'm admitting I was jealous... this is a once in a lifetime occurance.
It didn't help that Navy has been upset with me due to my study schedule. He isn't allowed to see me except for sunday's, and phone conversations are only permitted after 8pm (the phone is of until then). Therefore he's been acting strange, which aided in my quickly escalating jealousy.
However, I did speak to him about my issues (goo me! Verbalizing! I'm so proud of myself), to which he basically laughed at me and told me he would never and has never cheated - after which he expressed his frustration with my schedule and his life in general.
Other than that, my life is boring. I study, do questions, and (for the last week) obsess over small minute details.
updates:
- never talked to CPE - he e mailed an update on his life, i told him nothing about mine
- wrote the weird guy back and told him his advances were not wanted nor appreciated. He hasn't written me since, which has made me very happy.
I will probably blog more now that I am always trying to procrastinate - but it will probably be all about my boards. :/ ugh
Throughout this process I think I might be going crazy.
Since I study so much, navy has told me I have "nuke syndrome." Apparently all the "nukes" (nuclear engineer's) on the ship are uber smart. In fact they're so smart they don't get normal concepts. In navy talk he basically just called me a ditz. I can spit out the fact that the mentally challenged girl I saw at a national park has angelmann's syndrome, but ask me what time it is and I stare at the clock for a good 1-2 minutes before I can figure it out.
I have also been dealing with self esteem issues. My test grades aren't up to par, and I'm being self critical. This must also mean in my fragile little mind that navy doesn't love me anymore and that he's now attracted to the hot blonde on his softball team.
Yes, I'm admitting I was jealous... this is a once in a lifetime occurance.
It didn't help that Navy has been upset with me due to my study schedule. He isn't allowed to see me except for sunday's, and phone conversations are only permitted after 8pm (the phone is of until then). Therefore he's been acting strange, which aided in my quickly escalating jealousy.
However, I did speak to him about my issues (goo me! Verbalizing! I'm so proud of myself), to which he basically laughed at me and told me he would never and has never cheated - after which he expressed his frustration with my schedule and his life in general.
Other than that, my life is boring. I study, do questions, and (for the last week) obsess over small minute details.
updates:
- never talked to CPE - he e mailed an update on his life, i told him nothing about mine
- wrote the weird guy back and told him his advances were not wanted nor appreciated. He hasn't written me since, which has made me very happy.
I will probably blog more now that I am always trying to procrastinate - but it will probably be all about my boards. :/ ugh
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